One year home!!!

To our dearest friends and family—

As we come to the ONE YEAR anniversary of bringing our boys home from Ethiopia, we truly stand amazed at God’s faithfulness over the past year. And as we think about it, we realize that in most of the ways that God helped us and provided for us was THROUGH YOU…so we humbly and gratefully wanted to just say a huge THANK YOU!!!!! In all honesty, we know that none of this would have been possible without you; we spiritually, emotionally, financially, mentally, and physically would not have made it without all of you. The past year (and even longer) has not been without its tears and struggles, but one thing is for sure: God knew that we would need people to go through this journey with us, and we constantly stand in awe of how incredible a family and group of friends that we have been surrounded by!

As we look back, there are sooooo many ways in which you have upheld, supported, carried, and walked with us over the past year…like…the friend who helped start the whole thing 3 years ago by asking the question, “What’s stopping you?” after our talk about adoption, and then proceeded to hand over a check when we frankly said it was because of the cost to start the process… the incredible pasta dinner fundraiser that went way beyond our wildest expectations in so many ways…Daniel, for the greatest food ever!...the cooks, dessert-bakers, photo-takers, cleaner-uppers, dish-washers, and everyone else who played a part…family & friends to not just babysit, but love on the girls while we were gone…prayers that carried us safely to and in Ethiopia—and home again…Maria & Joel for selflessly traveling with us and unconditionally loving us and the three boys we picked up…the tons of people and hugs at the airport (a memory that will be imprinted forever in my mind b/c it was exactly what God knew I needed to sustain me after a grueling 34-hour trip)… Jess & Rock who “rescued” us that first night home…people who brought meals so that we didn’t have to cook for 29 days straight!...people who came over constantly to just do our dishes, help get kids in baths, then listen to us cry exhaustedly on the couch—and still love us!...friends who came during the days to fold laundry, clean, and play with kids while we made phone calls and paid bills…the scores of diapers that were bought for us…the people who simply brought over cookies, then sat on our couch after the kids were in bed so that the two of us could take a walk together and talk…the garden at Brenda’s where we could pick produce, but not have to do the labor—what a blessing!...the new van that works so wonderfully for the 7 of us…people who still invite our family over even though it’s a lot more chaotic with 5 children…clothes that were bought or handed down for all of the kids…the girls from the “west side” Bible study who challenged & helped me (Kate) grow as a mom & as a wife this year…Doug says for the people who shared beers with him and just gave encouragement :)… the Mars Hill adoption group—what would we do without a place to vent that ‘adoption rage’ and have so many who know exactly what we’re going through?! ... and soooo many more prayers, advice, encouragement, hugs, and shoulders to cry on that are too numerous to count---THANK YOU!

We PRAISE God for miracles and near miracles over the past year: for coming home as we expected—all together—when it didn’t look like that was going to be a reality during those anxious last few hours in Ethiopia dealing with the Embassy; for three little boys who were taken from everything they knew in Ethiopia…across the world to America where they are smiling, happy, social little kiddos who seem to fit right in!; for HEALTH, after lots of rounds of ringworm, the parasite giardia, Hepatitis A, and the scariness of what diseases could come home from Africa; for a son whose only English was “airplane”, “mommy” and “daddy” one year ago…to being able to easily communicate with pretty much anyone and even attend first grade!; for Abby willingly and selflessly giving up the title of “oldest” to her new big brother…and doing so with a gentle heart of care & love; for two screaming, flop-on-the-floor tantrum-throwers when things didn’t go their way…to two adorable twins who are getting pretty good at please, thank-you, and praying to God; for the molding and changing of Sofi’s heart as she was abruptly ousted from “youngest” to “big sister” with some not-so-easy-to-love little brothers who stole a LOT of attention for a long time…to now being such a big helper with the twins and finding it’s kinda fun to have playmates; for a son who, before lift-off in Addis Ababa, went through the entire backpack of toys that were supposed to last for the 30-hour trip to the USA because of his huge attention deficit…who didn’t like books, who couldn’t focus on one activity for literally more than 5 minutes for the first few months…to now finding great joy in listening to books and learning to read them, to fitting in in first grade, to enjoying playing games and doing activities as a family!!!; for two scared little twins who, in seeking security, would cling to anyone (including many strangers in the airports and grocery stores) and didn’t care at all for mom & dad…to running at full speed, screaming and giggling “Daddy!! Daddy! It’s Daddy!” when Doug walks in the door, and loving lots of hugs and kisses from mommy & daddy; for the bonds of love and family and attachment that have been forged and continue to grow between the 7 of us; for feeling that our family has gone from ‘’not gonna make it”…to barely hanging on…to surviving…to “hey, we can do this!”…to actually thriving! (Oh, it’s a great feeling!!!)

And those are just some of the miracles that God has allowed us to witness and take part in just in the past year! We thank you for your prayers and continual love for all 7 of us…and even more, we are thankful for your friendship that has rode that rollercoaster of ups and downs, joys and tears, fears and dreams with us. Philippians 1:3 only begins to tell it right: “I (we) thank my (our) God every time I (we) remember you!” We love you more than words can express and are definitely privileged to have you in our lives!

With all our love,
Doug, Kate, Abraham, Abby, Sofi, Cody & Austin VandenHoek

Living in chaos! ...but surviving! :)

Five kids (especially going from 2 to 5) is so tough....I mean, i knew it would be, but somedays I just feel like crawling into a hole and crying! :( Some moments are wonderful, but some are just plain awful and I wonder why God called us to do this...Then we remember, "it doesn't matter the 'WHY?' and we may never know...we just know that HE DID CALL US TO IT...so THAT'S WHY we're doing it..." And then life just keeps going! :)

I think one of the hardest parts is that we see the GIRLS struggling--feeling neglected, feeling like they get the "backseat", like all the attention and love and care is going to the boys...our totally independent 3 1/2 year old is now super cry-y and cling-y to me (kate) and just flips out if I go somewhere without her...my oldest (6 next week) seems to have gone into a 'shell'--sometimes super helpful with the boys and soemtimes just gets really frustrated that they even are part of the family now.... so then I feel guilty and worried and I MISS being able to give them two all my love and attention...so one of the hardest things is finding ways to show love and attention (fairly/equally) between all 5 kids...

Twins aren't great at sleeping thru the night (ugh! That's a hard one for me!), but we're working on it! :) They are so fun and adorable, that generally I still am happy to see them at the start of another day... :) Abraham has his moments of bringing us joy and adding just a whole new dimension to our life and family as a BOY and now being the OLDEST and all of us trying to communicate with mostly motions--it can be a blast!....yet, he is very stubborn and doesn't seem to have ever been told "no" or "share" before in his life (unfortunately, he was in for a rude awakening coming into our home and having 4 siblings!) So he alternates between: being super loving and playful (he learned how to ride a bicycle for the first time 2 weeks ago, and then 2 days ago decided he could do it with no training wheels! and is LOVING it despite MANY crashes!)-OR - throwing tantrums like a "terrible twos" 2-year-old. And those instances may be totally random--(like b/c I pulled back his bed covers to have him crawl in...weird stuff like that) or they may just be b/c we said he wasn't allowed to hit one of his siblings. Soooo, then we struggle with how to deal with that: time out, time "in" (on our laps, sometimes forced), sent to room for crying on the floor like a baby, or just scooped up and hugged while he's screaming??? Sooooo frustrating!

So yeah, that's life right now. And then by 9pm, Doug and I are soooo exhausted--and the supper dishes haven't been picked up, the mail/bills haven't been paid, the poopy laundry hasn't been thrown in the washer, we haven't exercised, haven't done Bible study, haven't spent "down" time relaxing---but we jsut instead fall into bed.....and the next day starts all over again!!!!! We keep praying that the days get better, our wisdom grows, our time multiplies, and God gives us more and MORE GRACE!!!

And we are soooo THANKFUL for SOOOO MANY PEOPLE who are constantly praying for us, cooking for us, stopping over to HELP us clean up those supper dishes and play with our kids, for allowing us time to take a walk together (thanks, Bosmas!), for just being company to sit here and talk and LISTEN when we're struggling---we love you and are thankful to God for each one of you as we struggle through the challenges of this transition time. We keep praying (and counting on) there being less and less struggles and challenges (and less poopy diapers) and more and more joys and smiles EACH DAY! :)

Home at Last!

Well...we really are HOME...our bed never felt so good (although, we really haven't slept in it TOGETHER all that much), food tastes better here than in Ethiopia (although we really don't have much time to cook--so a huge thank you to people who are bringing meals!!!)---but all in all, we are surviving! Boys are doing really well--Abraham is working on English and we are able to communicate decently with simple words and lots of hand motions! Twins are sleeping most of the night, only waking up once in the middle (unfortunately it's not at the same time, so it still makes for a long night!) Our girls are doing ok--hard adjustment--Sofi is really weep-y, but can't express what's wrong; Abby's having a hard time sleeping....It's all hard for the kids b/c they all want more attention, and it's hard for us as Mom and Dad when we want to give each one so much more attention, but are still just trying to figure each other all out and get used to life with a family of 7!!!

THANK YOU, THANK YOU to all the people who met us at the airport--what a welcome site and huge blessing to be met with hugs and come into the arms of people who love us and have prayed us through this journey (even though we hadn't really slept in 45 hours and had spit up and drool on our clothes and looked horrible!)---we truly love you all!!! And thank you to everyone who is bringing meals, who has watched our girls, who is praying for us, who took our trash, who cleaned our house----we are so grateful!!!

Please continue to pray for us as it's such a huge adjustment! Pray that we will have PATIENCE and that we will BOND AND LOVE EACH OTHER AS A FAMILY!!!

The JOYS of today: Doug taught Abraham how to ride a bike, and we couldn't get him off of it! (yes, VanderKoddes, we also took him to buy him a bike HELMET!) :) And Abenezer is just loving walking all over and checking out his new home! And Yisehak just makes us want to cuddle him constantly with his adorable looks!

arriving in grand rapids

we have cleared customs and are in chicago. will be in GRR on time ..6:38
we were able to take an earlier flight out of Dulles See you soon!

Heading Home

Yesterday went really well at the Embassy. It was very busy and extremely hot... which did not go over well with 3 boys who do not like to sit still. However, God blessed us with an extremely nice Embassy worker who was very excited for us and got us processed quickly. Thank you for all of your prayers on this.

We will be heading to Alemu's house today for coffee and lunch. There he will give us all of our documents/visas so we can head home tonight.

Something extra to pray for... Abraham was out kicking the soccer ball with Joel after breakfast and lost his breakfast in the flowers. We are not sure if he is sick or if he is just feeling very scared. Please pray that he starts feeling better and that the flight home is time for him to rest.

We head to the airport today at 7ish so we can leave Ethiopia around 9:30. We are all anxious and nerves are swirling. Our prayer is that everyone is sleepy and we can rest most of the long flight to Washington Dulles. There we will have to be awake as we go through customs. Then we do some small flights from Dulles to Chicago where we need to be on time so we can catch our flight to GRR. Again we covet your prayers.

Reminder - you are all welcome to come to GRR tomorrow night:
SATURDAY NIGHT APRIL 24th - ARRIVING INTO GRAND RAPIDS, MI --6:38PM--UNITED 7449--(FROM CHICAGO O'HARE, FROM WASHINGTON/DULLES)

Love you all! THX
~Vanden Hoeks

Three Beautiful Boys!

Soooo, wow! Obviously the biggest news is that we now are the proud parents of THREE BOYS, besides our two girls! They are adorable!

Let's see:Monday, we drove home from Awassa and stopped at a cool beach, where we could actually put our feet in the water--it was gorgeous--Doug was missing his boat and wakeboard!

Tuesday, we went to the Merkato (biggest open air market in Africa); TONS of people and lots of "shops"--mud, donkeys, vendors, beggars, lots of spices, and everything from car parts to plastic ware to souvenirs. Then we went to a little bit "safer" street (in the merkato, we actually had 2 "body guards" walking with us) to do some more "shopping" (buying gifts to bring home). At night we went to a traditional Ethiopian dinner and dance show at a restaurant--quite the experience! We were ready to be done with Ethiopian food, didn't enjoy the tej (honey wine), and the music was a little too much after 3 hours!!! (But we DO have some great pics of JOEL DANCING!) :)

Yesterday was the big day, as we went to tour the Holy Trinity Orthodox cathedral, then visit the lions at the lion zoo. At 2:30, we went to Enat Alem orphanage in the pouring rain. As we stood on the tiny office, the nannies brought our boys to us--Abraham ran and threw his arms around me and said "mommy"...and we just hugged and cried! Doug grabbed the twins (Abenezer was super snuggly with anyone and refused to look, play, get down; Yishak wanted nothing to do with any of us except the nannies and Abraham!) Pretty much the same all day...Abenezer is quite fine with holding on tight to anyone who will pick him up, and Yishak cries unless Abraham picks him up and carries him! We're working on it! :) This morning the twins woke up at 4:30 and didn't feel like sleeping again! But we did get to see Abenezer walk--yes, he's walking just fine!!!--and Yishak actually sat on my lap without crying to eat his cereal this morning, then practice walking while holding our hands. Both boys think it's pretty funny to wear shoes! :)

Doug says this is a novel, so I better finish! Twins are sleeping (finally down for a nap) and we are going to play UNO with Abraham and VanderKoddes. So far, Abraham's favorite thing is the camera and looking at people!

Love you all! Getting anxious to be in our own beds with our own schedule, American food, and seein' all your pretty faces!!

Day in Awassa, ET

We had a great day today! Fun breakfast buffet with interesting pancakes, but great eggs with peppers in them!

Then we stopped at a coffee farm...saw what coffee looks like when it's growing on the tree--little green berry-like things---growing in what looks kinda like a small rain forest. (Dad VH--we'll try to bring you some ET coffee home!) Coffee trees surrounded by "false-banana" trees...kinda like walking in the middle of a tall corn field! We got to go into the farmer's home--a large mud and straw hut where there's a fire pit, some benches, and where all the animals sleep next to the people. We sure are humbled---how can we complain about dirty carpet, hard beds, or our water not getting hot enough quickly enough?!? So many of these people have bare mud/dirt floors, no actual beds, cook over a fire, have no running water, and sleep next to their goats and cows.... the world is not fair... We are reminded of how materially blessed we are, but it's pretty hard to be ok in your heart when you see this... The world is not right...it's not the way it's meant to be...

Probably 40 kids clamoured and fought to be around us--I had brought a big bag of candy and they were all yelling and screaming and pushing to get some...Alemu made them sing and dance and tried to get them to stand in a line, but we still just got mobbed! I think they like candy just like the VanderKodde boys and VandenHoek girls do!

After the coffee, we visited EVADO orphanage--got to see the place where our boys stayed---met 2 of the nannies and the director. We brought a soccer ball and bubbles for them to play with us and then to keep--kids LOVED both of them! We tried to get some sense of Abraham, Yisehak, and Abenezer's personality, etc. from the nannies---it sounds like Abraham REALLY watched out for and loved on his baby brothers. That warmed our hearts! :)

Our afternoon adventure was a "hippo tour"---we road in rickety little wooden boats on pretty rough water, with a little 15 horse motor, in a thunderstorm, way across Lake Awassa (huge lake!) to get pretty close to these massive hippos. Dad Busscher, you would have LOVED having your Whaler, we said!!! To both of our moms--we all wore something that looked like a life jacket and we tried not to get hit by the lightning! :) All you could see of the hippos was their heads; they were swimming in about 10-15 feet of water, but it was still a cool experience! We tried to get a lot of pics...and someone please tell our Abby that we are all safe and nobody got hurt! :) Pretty wet and windy ride, but we laughed and said how we wished we had our boat our there!

Enjoying the macchiatos (coffee drink)--that would be Doug; and the pineapple juice--that would be Kate. Trying to eat mostly authentic food wherever we go, but trying not to get sick---Alemu just barely kept us from eating raw ground beef today (we thought it was just really finely diced tomatoes!--dumb Americans!)

Played Wizard tonight with Nathan, Amy, Joel, Doug, Kate (me)--someone, please be proud--I actually came in second place (beating Joel & Doug)!

Anyway, pray for safety tomorrow as we drive back to Addis Ababa in a very cramped van and interesting driving conditions! We're heading to take showers and wash some nasty mud and gross lake water off of ourselves! :)